Perhaps Melania Trump couldn't help herself, but America's new First Lady packed a whole lot of insecure negativity into her official White House portrait. We don't know if her big bauble is from the Donald or her QVC jewelry collection, as New York Magazine suggests. Wind machine or no wind machine, Vaseline on her eyelids -- we can't tell. One thing is clear: having a First Lady portrait is the last goddess-damned good idea in Melania Trump's mindset. Yikes!

With both the Donald and Melania Trump being so media conscious and believing that it's all about image, I decided to stay out of the liberal media and head over to Westsidetoastmasters.com and their book of body language. Serving Santa Monica, West Los Angeles, and Greater Los Angeles, this chapter is part of the international nonprofit Toastmasters International.

About those Crossed Arms

Both arms are folded together across the chest as an attempt to put a barrier between the person and someone or something they don't like. . . Crossed-Arms-on-Chest is universal and is decoded with the same defensive or negative meaning almost everywhere. It is commonly seen among strangers in public meetings, in queues or cafeteria lines, elevators or anywhere that people feel uncertain or insecure.

Bottom line with crossed-arms-on-chest main Melania Trump message: she's not coming out and you're not coming in.

When the crossed arms then become the Double-Arm-Grip as Melania Trump is posing, additional reinforcement is achieved in a form of self-hugging. Westside Toastmasters explains that in extended, hostile debates, the arms are easily gripped so tight that one's fingers and knuckles can turn white, with blood circulation being cut off. The pose shows a very negative attitude and definitely a message of "I do not want to be standing here."

By contrast, former First Lady Michelle Obama hit all the high notes cited by Westside Toastmasters. There's the minor matter of an official White House setting and not some Sears-photo drive-by as Melania Trump chose. (Note that NY Mag came up with the Sears reference, not AOC). Michelle is open to receive and welcoming. She is gracious but welcoming. Her having the desk as a minor prop is perfect, according to Westside Toastmasters.

Michelle Obama -- who wasn't exactly comfortable her first weeks as First Lady either -- plays by the successful woman's mantra -- "never let them see you sweat"! No matter what was going through her mind at the moment, Mrs. Obama rose to the occasion and winged it. Melania Trump, on the other hand, looks like a miserable Stepford wife saying "please, oh goddess, please tell me he doesn't run for a second term!!!"

Hey, we don't want to be mean, and hopefully Melania Trump will warm up to us Americans. Then again, the Trump's have a very strong "let them eat cake" attitude. The new First Lady may just hunker down in her glam spa room at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and wait it out. ~ Anne